


Conflicted

by imaginarycircus



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-25
Updated: 2011-07-25
Packaged: 2017-10-21 17:50:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/227938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginarycircus/pseuds/imaginarycircus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for a prompt meme: "I have been dying to see a fic where someone writes about the fact that Steve has pierced ear holes!"</p><p><a href="http://www.alexoloughlin.org/gallery/albums/invisible/invisible_323.jpg">Because</a> <a href="http://s4.hubimg.com/u/134767_f520.jpg">Alex</a> <a href="http://0.tqn.com/d/movies/1/0/t/W/O/theinvisiblepic14.jpg">does</a>. :D</p>
            </blockquote>





	Conflicted

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sunhawk (sunhawkflamesprite)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunhawkflamesprite/gifts).



His father didn't notice that he'd had his ears pierced, of course Steve's hair was long enough to cover the studs, which were small silver balls. He'd expected that his father would just know somehow, know immediately that Steve had gone against his word. Steve tilted his head down so his hair covered his ears and part of his face. He was standing in front of the open refrigerator since he was almost always hungry.

"All your homework done?" His father'd said.

Steve had nodded, tucked his hair behind his ear, and held his breath, waiting for his father's face to grow thin and angry. Instead his father just nodded and wandered into his office. Steve wasn't sure if he was pissed off or relieved, and decided he was both even though that didn't make much sense.

Mary noticed the next morning. She pulled his hair back to double check and then just rolled her eyes. She'd gotten her ears pierced when she was like five.

"If Jordan starts getting tattoos you are so screwed," she said.

"I'm not getting any tattoos." Steve pushed past her to put the orange juice back in the fridge.

"How many piercings does he have now?"

"I don't know. Maybe like seventeen?" Steve shrugged. He knew Mary thought Jordan was a bad influence, which was rich coming from her, Queen of the bad influence.

"Are you going to get your nipples done next?" She waggled her eyebrows.

Steve choked on his orange juice.

"I'll take that as a 'no'," she said over her shoulder as she ran back upstairs.

But he'd thought about it, wondered what that zing of pain would be like in a place more sensitive than his ears, and more tied to his groin. He got a little hard just imagining it and was very glad Mary had left the kitchen to finish getting ready for school.

Jordan had a barbell through each nipple, multiple ear piercings, even one up in the cartilage along the shell of his ear. He was long past going to the mall and having piercings done with that thing that looked like a staple gun. He had all his piercings done by a hot chick at a tattoo and piercings place. But the mall staple gun had been all Steve could afford. He didn't tell Jordan he was going to doing it. Just showed up at school. Pierced.

"Nice," Jordan said and thumped Steve on the back. That one word of praise had him floating all day. Jordan had also said, "We gonna hit the Pipe later? Awesome."

Steve was a good surfer. He'd started when he was a kid and Jordan had only picked up a few years back, but he was good too, just not as good as Steve. Steve never said no to surfing because out on the ocean with the salt and the sun and wind, Steve could forget for a little while that his life had gone to shit. He watched Jordan twist into a wave and ride it in, which was another great thing about surfing. He could stare at Jordan's body without looking like a perv. He wanted to know what the ocean tasted like running down Jordan's chest and what it would feel like to flick his tongue against the barbells in Jordan's nipples.

Steve never said anything, never made a move. He dated girls, but he never stopped wanting what he couldn't have, believed he wasn't allowed to want.

Until there was Danny who overtook him like a forest fire during a dry spell. Danny engulfed him and burned all his fears down to ash and pure lust. But Danny also noticed and wanted Steve right back so instead of just looking and longing they have this thing between them that is like push and pull with an electric current run through it.

Steve lost track of Jordan when he moved to the mainland and then went on to Annapolis, but he ran into him one day while he was out grabbing lunch.

"Steve! Man! Howzit?" And it took Steve a few seconds to recognize that the man with short brown hair was Jordan. The piercings were gone. He explained that he had a wife, three kids and worked in a bank. And he'd heard about Five-O so Steve doesn't have to explain what he does, which he was relieved about. They part with a half-assed agreement to get together, which Steve knew probably wouldn't happen. He was both relieved and sad about that.

He picked up the lunch order and glanced at himself in the rearview mirror once he is back in his truck. He can still make out the holes in his ear lobes though he hasn't worn earrings in almost twenty years. Funny how things that once were so all consumming and important meant so little at present. Steve shook his head and hurried to get lunch back to the office. Danny will bitch at him if he takes too long, because he gets tetchy when his blood sugar is low.

Steve can't imagine a time when Danny won't be important to him though, doesn't want to, but he knew that he had no control over these things and sometimes bad things just happened, and other times people grew apart. He could do his best not to ever take Danny or what they had for granted, he could try very hard not to let things between them slip, let other priorities crowd in and push Danny away, and he could hope for all he was worth.


End file.
